When I hear the word “God,” I think of big things.  Vast space.  Endless time.  Omniscience and omnipotence.  I think of a booming thunderous voice.  Yes, I think of Morgan Freeman a little bit.

I also think of a great mystery.  Who is God?  Does he even exist?  And if he does, why does he care about me?

I think God is good.  In this modern world, I think we try to dilute God.  We try to make Him into our own idea of what a god is.  God is loving and accepting.  God just wants us to be happy.  God thinks we should do what works for us.  This is all self-serving and if we look behind the curtain we see that God is only a puppet and we’re the puppeteers, serving ourselves and saying it’s God’s will and it’s what God wants for our lives.  God becomes something we create, something controllable and safe.

But I think God is actually  like what the Beaver says of Aslan in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, “Safe?   Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King, I tell you.”

God is good.  God is the king.

I think God exists.

On an intellectual level, I think He exists because, as C.S. Lewis has said, we all have an innate sense of what’s right and wrong.  If there wasn’t a higher being to judge between what’s right and what’s wrong, why would we care so much about doing right or being good?  Who would we be trying to please?  And why wouldn’t the world just break out in complete havoc with everyone doing every wrong thing?

I think God exists because of what I see around me.  I had to get up at 5:30 on a Saturday recently – and if you know me, you know I don’t get up at 5:30 voluntarily – even if it’s not a Saturday.

It was pitch black.  I was driving along the dark road, inhaling coffee and listening to NPR, and the sun started to rise.  This is shocking for me because I have never seen it do that.  I’m joking, but this is a rare situation for me.  As I drove toward the sunrise and watched the orange and yellow light catch in the clouds surrounding Baltimore, I had a moment where I wished I was a painter and could capture the layers in that scene with paint.  And yet, I knew even that medium wouldn’t do it justice.

I found myself wondering why a world with a sunrise like that would exist if there wasn’t a God to create it?  Why would there be any beauty reflected unless the world had a maker to depict that beauty in His own image?

But I also believe God exists.  I think belief in God is a choice.  Today, we all fight for a choice in something.  We all want to make a decision – from what women can or can’t do with their bodies to who is allowed or not allowed to get married.  Arguments say, “We deserve a choice.  We deserve to choose.”  Well, God also gives us a choice.  Belief is an active decision we make to put our faith, hope, and trust in God and to enter into a relationship with Him.

We choose to believe not because there’s concrete proof, evidence, or facts – although I do think there is some of that.  We choose to believe because the gospel offers us mysteriously good news that says God sent His Son Jesus to live a perfect life, die a perfect death, conquer death, and vanquish our sins.

And I believe God cares about me.  Why?  I see Him answer my prayers.  I’ve prayed every day for some things and I’ve seen Him answer those prayers over time.  Because God is the author of time, the maker of heaven and earth, I think He has a plan for each of our lives specifically.  I think the more we put our hope in Him and the more we trust Him, the more we can see His work in our lives.

It’s a profound mystery that God would sacrifice His Son so that we could live.

And yet, because of that sacrifice the Bible says in Matthew 17:20, “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

If we believe in God and put our faith in Him, we can do great things.

You can find Jana on twitter @jana_stambaugh.