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Parenting Matters really do matter!
Often times, when two newlyweds are alone, life is good. But add one or both sets of kids to the mix, and their happy marriage seems to go up in smoke?
Why? It’s a “couple issue” that is revealed when the kids are present. If the couple can reason together and agree on such issues as: discipline, parenting style and fairness, then they have a peaceful future ahead of them – even when the kids are around.
This takes work. It takes commitment. It takes healthy communication.
We tend to parent in the same fashion that our parents parented us. And, usually, our spouse comes from a different style. Throw in past [parenting successes and failures that precede your marriage, and parenting in this new stepfamily can get very sticky.
Some keys to overcoming parenting obstacles include:
1) commit yourself to unconditionally loving your stepchildren. Kids can see right through someone who is not fully vested in the relationship and often don’t behave as though they appreciate the new parent. But this commitment of love is critical.
2) Spousal trust, support and communication are absolutely necessary.
3) Both parents must have a united front. Children can see holes in the armor and exploit these weaknesses all too easily. So, get behind closed doors and come to an agreement on parenting styles and rules before addressing your kids. And speaking of rules – keep them fair and equal across the board.
For more tips on how to successfully blend your stepfamily, visit www.nouveaulifecoaching.com.