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I wanted to talk about an issue that’s near and dear to my heart, because we have so much of it in my family and maybe you can tell me if this has touched your families as well…hearing loss!

We’ve got a lot of hearing loss in my family, so if some of you out there have hearing loss, or need hearing aids, or know someone who does, I just want to tell you it’s going to be okay. It’s not that bad. I mean, it’s hard, but it’s not that bad. I know this because, like I said, we have all kinds of hearing loss in our family. Starting with my grandpa, who could not hear at all. He had 50 grandkids and because of his hearing loss, he thought all of us were like super well behaved kids. Never had a problem in the world with us. He also thought nobody could ever hear him belch or make any other noises, which I won’t bring up, out of respect at this time.

But my grandpa’s favorite question was, “What?!” Grandma would say, “Ivan it’s six, it’s time for the news.” “What!?” “It’s time for the news!” “What!?” “THE NEWS!” “Well, I’m not hungry.”

I remember that very well actually. But my wife, has severe hearing loss and, her hearing aids are hidden very well. She got hearing aids shortly after we were married, in her late twenties – when she was diagnosed with nerve damage. It’s weird, because none of us really knew she was hard of hearing – she’s so good at reading lips – but we should’ve picked up on the clues, because I find myself shouting things like, “HOW WAS YOUR DAY!” “What?”“HOW  WAS  YOUR  DAY!” And she’d be like, “Quit mumbling!”

But now, she has hearing aids, and now she’ll get annoyed, get out of her chair, walk downstairs, and find me somewhere in the basement, and say, “You are breathing, so loud, for the love of Pete, please, stop.” Which I try not to take personal.

Before she got hearing aids, she didn’t know computers made noises, or leaves, or kitchen timers, when she was making cookies, which made for some… interesting… episodes.

But if you think about hearing aids, people think, “Well, I don’t want to get them because they look terrible.” They don’t. You can’t even tell she’s wearing them. They are so small now, hearing aids have really cool features now.

My buddy Matt, another young guy, has blue tooth, in his hearing aids. Which is very cool, he listens to the game during church. The pastor just thinks he is being very enthusiastic, because he’s like, “YEA! YEA! GO! UGH! BAD CALL! UGH!”

So, if you need hearing aids, don’t despair, because they can change the quality of your life. Plus, if you get hearing aids, your life, now has a remote control. It’s wonderful: Naggy toddler – turn the ears down. Joke-telling husband – turn the ears down. Teenager – turn the ears down, take out the batteries, bury the batteries, in the backyard, smash the hearing aids, and burn the remnants!

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